Cute without the 'e'
by Love an' Vain
Summary: Life is spirling down. Clare begans to learn life is not how it should be
1. Just A Little Girl

Hi guys... Ok so pretty much I wanted to start a new story! I liked my other two very much, but I had alot of school studying to do. I had a bunch of finals coming up, I was also busy with my boyfriend. I couldn't do much on the computer cause I was grounded... So I hope you guys like my new series. I know everyone has taken a little twist on Clare's mother just leaving and Clare's father beating her, or other way around. But this is my new version of it. Oh, Clare and Eli are not dating, repeat! Clare and Eli are **NOT** dating... Ok well enjoy the story! Byee:)

Clare's POV

It's to late to go back in time and change everything that happened in the last year. Too many things that I can't do over again. Too many things that I regret. I wish time would go back before my mother got pregnant with me. Maybe they would have changed their mind, about having another child. They shouldn't of had me.

" Ms. Edward, would you please come up and read your poem."

" Uh, yes Ms. Dawes."

I grab my homework out of my folder. I slowly get out of my seat and walk up to the front of the class. I take a deep breathe in before I begin to read.

**_"Little Girl, the world is evil._**  
><strong><em>Bad people all around.<em>**  
><strong><em>You never know what will happen.<em>**  
><strong><em>Take life slowly,<em>**  
><strong><em>Don't rush.<em>**  
><strong><em>Little girl,<em>**  
><strong><em>Don't trust everyone you meet.<em>**  
><strong><em>You worst enemies could be your family.<em>**  
><strong><em>Little Girl, the world is evil."<em>**

The class looks around, wondering what my poem was suppose to mean. I know what it exctualy means. I heard my sister tell me so many times, after her rape that the world was evil. I learned that after my sister left for Kenya. And my mother moved to New Jersey. My father first was very upset, as was I. We asked one another how we were doing whenever we saw one another. But that stopped about a month after my mother left. It then turned into verbal abuse. And then another month after he pushed me down the stairs and began to become abusive with everything I did.

Everything in my life was falling apart. My mother had called me, said she found another family who didn't hate her. She finaly felt loved, and she never wanted to speak with me or my father again. I cried for days after that. I would cry myself to sleep for at least four days after that phone call.

" That was, um, very nice Clare. You may take a seat now. Eli why don't you go next?"

" Yes Ms. Dawes."

Eli sat right infront of me. I was sorta of his friend but still very unsure. Eli, Adam, and I hanged out all the time. I most hanged out with them because of Adam. Adam made me feel safe. Like no matter what no one could hurt me while he was near. But Eli sorta scared me. I didn't completely trust him. I was afraid he would try to hurt me. I was terrified of him.

_**" You think your hiding everything so well,  
>Well let me tell you girl.<br>Your not very good at hiding.  
>I see you scars, and cuts.<br>I see your tears and your bruises.  
>I see how much you hurt inside.<br>I see your broken heart.  
>Everyone just passes by you.<br>They see right through you.  
>Except me, I see that pain.<br>I know how you feel,  
>but you can't step down!<br>Stand up for yourself,  
>Stand up for what you believe!<br>Trust yourself,  
>Trust your friends.<br>We're here for you.  
>When you can't turn to anyone else."<strong>_

Eli finished reading his poem bowing to the loud clapping from all the classmates. He then looked at me, and bowed his head towards me. He knew? How did he know? He couldn't! I felt so sick. My stomach was making a churing noise and my eyesight was going in circles. Soon everything began fading. I don't know what happened, but the last thing I saw and heard, was boots walking towards me.

* * *

><p>Eli's POV<p>

Once I was done reading my poem, everyone began clapping for me. I bowed as dramatic, as I was. I then looked straight at Clare and bowed my head towards her. As I began walking back to my desk, Clare fainted, falling out of her desk. Her head thumping against the floor. I ran to her, picking her up. I didn't care what people thought, or Ms. Dawes would say later. I took Clare, in my arms, to the nuse. Right before we got there, she started stiring in my arms. I had to set her down on the floor for a second.

" Clare can you hear me?" I asked.

"Eli? What am I doing here! What are you gonna do to me!" Clare said.

" Clare you can trust me! I'm not gonna do anything to you! I promise." I told her, rubbing her shoulder.

" I don't trust you!" Clare cried pushing me away from her.

" Clare, calm down. It's ok!" I said embracing Clare into a friendly hug.

" Just get it over with! I'm used to it!" Clare sobbed.

" What?"

" Just get it over with!" Clare sobbed into her knees.

What did Clare think I was going to do to her? Better yet what happened to her! She acted as if I was going to hurt her! Like I would ever do that to her. She's my friend for hevan sakes! But what did Clare mean by 'Just get it over with! I'm use to it!' Was she used to being held in a friendly hug? What happened to Clare! Did she think I was going to rape her? Like I would ever do that to any girl ever! I'd never would hurt anyone like that! Ever! I had to prover to Clare I was a good person. But still that one line, that one sentece, those four words still didn't make any sense. 'I'm used to it!' Wht could she mean! How could I help her? Was Clare even safe at her own home? Who knew? All I knew, was that I was going to help her. I'd give her my strength to help win her battles.

* * *

><p>Clare's POV<p>

I was waiting for Eli to pick me up again, and bring me to the back of his hearse. And then there, he would rape me. I mean I had gotten use to it. My father brought many men home, all in line to get to me. They would wait there waiting to have their turn. The most guys who had sex with me in one night was at least seven. I remember the next day, it hurt to move. It hurt to walk, and it hurt to remember. I missed having my innocence. I wanted back back I don't think it's possible to get it back.

" Clare, what happened to you." Eli asked like he cared.

" You don't care... Can you please drive me home." I asked.

" Sure. Come on," Eli said offering me a hand.

" I can get up myself," I hissed.

" Uh, alrighty... Let's get going."

" Drive me straight home. No stopping any where!"

" Um, ok. If that's what you want.

" It's not what I want. It's what your gonna do, so I can get my work done early!"

" What work? You have a job." Eli asked as we walked down the front steps.

" Ya, sorta." I said, hoping he wouldn't ask anymore questions.

" What do you do?" He asked, while opening the door for me.

" Uh, just a bit of everything, ya know." I said closing my eyes.

" Actually, no I don't know." Eli kept going trying to get me to spill.

" Ya! It's great fun." That wasnt a lie. It was fun for the men.

" So... What kind of fun?"

" The fun, you have at work." I said, hoping for him to stop.

" Any hot guys work there?"

" Uh, no no. I don't contact with anyone there." I said again trying to stop him from asking anything else.

" So, when were you gonna tell me?"

" Tell you what?"

" Nevermind Clare... I think I know whats going on. But if you don't tell me, I can't help." Eli said.

" Don't worry about me! Thanks for the ride." I said as Eli drove onto my street.

" Hey Clare... I know you don't trust me... But if your getting hurt in anyway... Anyway at all, please tell me."

" I'm not. Don't worry about it. Byee Eli, thanks for the ride."

" Ya, no problem. Bye Clare."

I walked up the drive way, and to the door. Once inside, I saw my father and five other men inside. The usual number of men. All of the guys looked at me. I knew what I had to do though. Strip right infront of them, and lead one of them into my bedroom. And then just lay there. Let them do what they want. Do what they tell me to. And let me tell you, it was always terrible! Never could I get a brake. Never did I get the chance to stop.

" Hello there, young lady." Said the first man.

He had green eyes, blonde hair, and tan skin. He kissed my hand and bowed to me. I took his hand and led him to my room. He begand slowly kissing me, from my cheeck down to my collarbone. And then he ripped my shirt down the middle, and tried snuggling inbetween them. He then kissed me down until he reached my waist. This is when I began to freeze and wait for them to hurt me. Instead though he came back up and began massasing my left boob and sucking on the right one. He then switched. He continuted hoping for me to make a noise of pleasure. When I didn't, he decided to slap me. I then made fake noises hoping he was pleased. Of course then, he started unbuttoning my pants, and pulling them down along with my purple panties. I began terrified again. But I wouldn't make a sound, I wouldn't move, I wouldn't let them break me. Once he was done, he kissed my earlobe, whispering that he wanted me again. And then he left. I quickly got ready for the next guy.

" Hi, your name must be Clare!" The second guy said.

He had brown hair, green eyes, and pale skin. He grabbed my hand and led the way upstairs... He didn't wait to get in the room. He grabbed me and pushed me against a wall, lifting me up until our lips meet. He looked familiar, very familiar. He carried me to the white door of my room, and threw me onto my bed. He then climbed onto of me, and kissed me again.

" You know Clare, your amazing."

" You look familiar." I whispered.

" Cause I am!" He whispered back, and began taking off his mask.

" Eli?"

" Clare, I knew you were in danger! And your dad told me that you did sex for money. I paid him and got you. But not for what you do for all the other guys. I came here to help you. Come on, let's sneak out, I'll find you a better place to live."

" But I like my job, I like it here, my dad loves me," I lied.

_**[Verse 1]**_  
><em><strong>You never cared to hear the other side<strong>_  
><em><strong>So why would you care to keep this thing alive<strong>_  
><em><strong>You paint me into the memory of all your pain<strong>_  
><em><strong>But I will not be drawn into the past again<strong>_

_**[Chorus]**_  
><em><strong>'Cause all of this is all that I can take<strong>_  
><em><strong>And you could never understand the demons that I faced<strong>_  
><em><strong>So go ahead and bat your eyes and lie right to the world<strong>_  
><em><strong>For what everything you are<strong>_  
><em><strong>You're just a little girl<strong>_

_**[Verse 2]**_  
><em><strong>I never meant for you to feel this way<strong>_  
><em><strong>The Decembers were never meant to be our graves<strong>_  
><em><strong>It's not a question of who was wrong and what is right<strong>_  
><em><strong>But time cannot heal what you will never recognize<strong>_  
><em><em>

_**[Chorus]**_  
><em><strong>'Cause all of this is all that I can take<strong>_  
><em><strong>And you could never understand the demons that I faced<strong>_  
><em><strong>So go ahead and bat your eyes lie right to the world<strong>_  
><em><strong>For what everything you are<strong>_  
><em><strong>You're just a little girl<strong>_

_**[Bridge]**_  
><em><strong>So go ahead and cry<strong>_  
><em><strong>So go ahead and believe that you were right<strong>_  
><em><strong>Keep away the dark to help you sleep tonight<strong>_

_**[Background]**_  
><em><strong>Go on and decide<strong>_  
><em><strong>Who is wrong, what is right<strong>_  
><em><strong>'Cause you know inside<strong>_

_**[Chorus]**_  
><em><strong>'Cause all of this is all that I can take<strong>_  
><em><strong>And you could never understand the demons that I faced<strong>_  
><em><strong>So go ahead and bat your eyes and lie right to the world<strong>_  
><em><strong>For what everything you are... <strong>_

_**'Cause all of this is all that I can take**_  
><em><strong>And you could never understand the demons that I faced<strong>_  
><em><strong>So go ahead and bat your eyes and lie right to the world<strong>_  
><em><strong>For what everything you are<strong>_  
><em><strong>You're just a little girl<strong>_


	2. It's Easier to Run

So the last chapter was a cliffy! Here comes the new one:) Enjoy!... Oh if your wondering why my story is sorta depressing, ya my boyfriend broke up with me... He thinks we can't be together anymore cause were not in the same grade:'( Anyways whateves here we go!

Clare's POV

"Don't lie to me!" Eli whispered back with anger.

" It's not a lie! Life is perfect here! I love it!" I lied again.

" Clare I can tell your lying!"

" I'm not though. Eli everything is perfect."

" Clare no it's not! You need to get out of here!"

" I don't want to. I love my dad, I love my job, and I love my life here!"

" Clare, please let me help you!" Eli pleaded.

Couldn't he see, everything was fine! Nothing ever happened to me. I was completely safe here. My dad loved me! I mean he had to right? I'm his youngest child. I'm his own sweat and blood. I have him in me. I act like him. He can't act like I'm nothing! He has to love me! He has to right? Ugh I hate being so young, and no knowing anything!

" I don't need help Eli."

" Clare! Please let me help you! If I leave here without you, one I'll go to Adam and tell him everything! And then two, I'll go to the police and tell them everything that you father has made you done!" Eli whispered yelled.

" Shh, Eli he didn't make me do this! I wanted to! Look you should go, just tell my dad that I didn't listen to you, and that you want a refund... He'll give it back." I told him.

" Then what will he do to you?"

" Don't worry Eli. Just go."

" Clare, I'm worried for you!"

" It's ok, don't worry... Byee Eli!"

Eli walked out of my room, and I began to sob. Why was my life so bad? I mean my dad had to love me, but Eli did make a point. If my dad loved me so much why would he make me have sex with so many guys. In the last ten months I had sex with at least seventy-seven men. Alot so I think!

" Well, well if it isn't little Clarebear," said the next guy.

Clarebear? Who else knew that nickname? Other than people like K.C. and his friends. K.C. had made up the nickname, so he could have told his friends. But still. Once he came through the door, I saw his face more clearly. It was none other than the worst person ever at Degrassi Community School: Fitz.

" No hi back? Well isn't that rude!" Fits said.

I began to shake uncontrolable. Tears collected in my eyes, and slowly began running down my face. He came over, and caressed my face. His hand then dropped down from my face to grabbing my waist and pulling me towards his body. He then lifted me up into his arms and carried me to the bed. He slowly took of my bra with one hand as his other started taking my belt off. Once my bra was off he stoped kissing me and ripped my shirt off. He then took me off of his lap and onto the bed where he climbed over on top of me.

" Come on Edwards. This is gonna be so much fun," Fitz said licking his lips.

" No! Fitz please stop!" I wouldn't be able to live with the memorie of having sex with someone I would see everyday of my life at school. I mean all the other men were fine, I probably wouldn't ever see them again. But now I'm extremely scared.

He slowly pulled off my jeans, and undress himself. The whole time I kept reminding myself, the faster I get done this, the more time I have for self pain. The more time I would get to plan what to do with myself. The more time to plan my ending. Once he was undressed, he began to go on with everything he wanted. Everything I didn't want to do. Everything I was scared to do.

* * *

><p>That night...<p>

I was completely whipped out. I had sex with six men. Five ones who paided, and then someone I can't ever talk to again. Someone who already terrified me, but now made it worst. Maybe Eli was right, maybe I wasn't safe at home anymore. I needed to just get away from here. Away from this house, away from this place, and away from Degrassi Community School.

Was there anywhere a girl could go for protection? For some reason I highly doubt it. I'm just hoping school will be much better tomorrow. And then after it, just maybe I could run for it. Maybe then I could leave this house for good. That's if he didn't catch me.

* * *

><p>Eli's POV (At school)<p>

" Eli! What the hell happened to Clare? What'd you do!" Clare's best friend Alli yelled as she ran towards me.

" What are you talking about? Alli, I didn't do anything to hurt Clare! I never would."

" Then what's with the txt she sent me!" Alli said pulling out her phone. " See! It says: _Forget me please. I'm trying to make this easier. I'm sorry that I'm saying goodbye to your face. But I can't, I just can't. I love you Alli. Have a great life:) - Clare._ See what I mean!"

" Alli, I seriously don't know what's going on. But I'll talk to her." I said reassuring me more than her.

Clare couldn't hurt herself. I couldn't let her do anything bad. I had to help her. Clare might be nothing more than a friend, but I'm still aloud to save her. I mean that's what friends do... Right?

* * *

><p>Clare's POV<p>

I walked into school, looking down at my pink flats. They were the last pair of shoes I could save. I was able to pack three pairs of jeans, three shirts, two hoodies, and one pair of socks in my school bag. I also had another small bag that held my laptop, hair brush, toothbrush, toothpaste, and four hundred dollars. Hopefully that will last me awhile. Of course I also had my cell phone, and my sneakers just in case my feet hurt from wearing flats.

I couldn't believe I was truely doing this. Truely leaving my home. Leaving my father. My friends. My school. I don't know where I'll go. I'll find someone who will help me. Maybe I could go to New York, and find Declan. Maybe Declan will still help me. I mean I am like his little sister right. Pretty much. That or maybe I can go find some of Darcy's friends and ex-boyfriends who would help me. Maybe Peter? Or Spinner? Who knows? Maybe there's someone bound out there to help.

" Clare! Clare! Clare we need to talk!" I heard someone yell.

I turned around. It was none other than Elijah Goldsworthy. I couldn't talk to him. I turned back around walking towards my locker. I wasn't gonna talk to him, I just couldn't, wouldn't. He can't make me talk. I won't talk. Nothing will. I heard his feet start to get closer as he ran towards me. I just kept on walking.

" Clare, stop please. I just want to talk. Please!"

I walked towards my locker still. Holding all the words I just wanted to spill. All the tears that were over filling my eyes. But I wouldn't show weakness. Eli then turned me around, crushing his lips onto mine. I opened my eyes widely, and tried pushing him off of me. He then stopped.

" Will you listen to me now?"

" Fine, what do you want?"

" I want to know, what was with that txt to Alli?"

" I'm leaving Eli. I won't be here after tonight."

" What do you mean?"

" Don't worry about me... I won't be living with my dad anymore."

" Where will you be living?"

" Hopefully New York."

" But Clare-"

" No Eli... I'm leaing tonight. So I guess this is goodbye."

" No, wait Clare! Why don't you live with me? And my family. We have a guest room, it could become yours. My parents won't mind at all! Please Clare."

" I'm not so sure about that Eli. I mean, I don't want to be a bother."

" Your not! Clare they won't mind! Please, Clare. I can't let my friend get hurt."

" I guess. Thanks Eli," I said giving him a hug.

" Your welcome." Eli smiled giving me a hug back...

**_It's easier to run_**  
><strong><em>Replacing this pain with something numb<em>**  
><strong><em>It's so much easier to go<em>**  
><strong><em>Than face all this pain here all alone<em>**

**_Something has been taken from deep inside of me_**  
><strong><em>The secret I've kept locked away no one can ever see<em>**  
><strong><em>Wounds so deep they never show they never go away<em>**  
><strong><em>Like moving pictures in my head for years and years they've played<em>**

**_(If I could change I would take back the pain I would)_**  
><strong><em>(Retrace every wrong move that I made I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(If I could stand up and take the blame I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(If I could take all the shame to the grave I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(If I could change I would take back the pain I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(Retrace every wrong move that I made I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(If I could stand up and take the blame I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(I would take all my shame to the grave)<em>**

**_[Chorus]_**  
><strong><em>It's easier to run<em>**  
><strong><em>Replacing this pain with something numb<em>**  
><strong><em>It's so much easier to go<em>**  
><strong><em>Than face all this pain here all alone<em>**

**_Sometimes I remember the darkness of my past_**  
><strong><em>Bringing back these memories I wish I didn't have<em>**  
><strong><em>Sometimes I think of letting go and never looking back<em>**  
><strong><em>And never moving forward so there'd never be a past<em>**

**_(If I could change I would take back the pain I would)_**  
><strong><em>(Retrace every wrong move that I made I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(If I could stand up and take the blame I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(If I could take all the shame to the grave I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(If I could change I would take back the pain I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(Retrace every wrong move that I made I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(If I could stand up and take the blame I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(I would take all my shame to the grave)<em>**

**_Just washing it aside_**  
><strong><em>All of the helplessness inside<em>**  
><strong><em>Pretending I don't feel misplaced<em>**  
><strong><em>It's so much simpler than change<em>**

**_[Chorus]_**  
><strong><em>It's easier to run<em>**  
><strong><em>Replacing this pain with something numb<em>**  
><strong><em>It's so much easier to go<em>**  
><strong><em>Than face all this pain here all alone<em>**

**_It's easier to run_**  
><strong><em>(If I could change I would take back the pain I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(Retrace every wrong move that I made)<em>**  
><strong><em>It's easier to go<em>**  
><strong><em>(If I could change I would take back the pain I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(Retrace every wrong move that I made I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(If I could stand up and take the blame I would)<em>**  
><strong><em>(I would take all my shame to the grave)<em>**

**Oh the drama is not over yet. It has yet begon... Ok so I don't know how long this story is gonna be... I'm thinking maybe 15-20 chapters, if I'm lucky... So ya! Hope you guys enjoy:)**


	3. Hush

Eli's POV ( Two Months Later)

I got Clare to stay at my house. I feel much better about it. I wouldn't be able to live knowing something could of happened to Clare. She was planning to run away into the states. All the way to New York. Sometimes I wonder if we we're suppose to meet. Was this how our stories written? Intertwined with one another? Who knows? The only thing I'm glad about is Clare isn't hurt. I mean she is, but she can't get anymore hurt than she was at her house.

I waited outside by Morty for Clare. She was grabbing her stuff out of her locker and than meeting me here. We we're also waiting for Adam. We were suppose to play video games after school today, but now I don't know. Finaly Clare comes out, with Adam by her side. It looks like she has a black eye. What the hell? After I said she wouldn't get hurt, and now look!

I ran up to Clare. " Oh my god! Clare are you alright?"

" I'm fine Eli. Don't worry about it."

" What the hell happened?" I asked.

" Stupid Jeanna" Adam replied.

" What the hell did she do?" I growled.

" Nothing Eli. Just don't worry about it. I'm completely fine." Clare spoke up.

" But that isn't right! Why would she hit you?"

" Eli drop it!" Clare yelled at me, walking towards Morty.

" What the hell happened to her? She's changed so much." Adam asked.

" Alot has happened. I'll tell you later. All you gotta know for now is, she's living at my house. Her's is to dangerous. I should have told you this alot sooner. She's been living there since October."

" Your telling me once we get in your room." Adam said sternly.

" Alrighty. I will." I told him as we headed towards Morty.

Clare was already sitting in the middle, looking at her phone, and then down at her bag. What did she have in there? What was she thinking about? I don't even know anymore. I don't understand how everything got so bad for her. She didn't deserve anything that has happened to her. I feel as if she'll never be able to break the chains that hold her back. The chains that make her life so much harder. It worries me that she'll try killing herself. That she won't be able to pull through everything she's been through.

Adam opened up his door, causing Clare to jump in fright. She looked over to my side as I opened my door. She then looked back down at her phone and then her book bag. What the hell was going on?

" Eli, can you stop at the closes pharamacy. Please." Clare asked me.

" Uh, sure... What for?" I asked.

" Nothing just, ya know. Never mind." said Clare.

" No Clare. What is it?" I asked her.

" I just need to get medicine for my headache." She replied.

" Oh, ok. Will do." I told her.

Once we pulled out of the parking lot, we began towards Walgreens. It was the closes one I could think of. Once we got there, Adam hoped out of Morty and Clare slid out after him. Adam hoped back in as Clare headed inside.

* * *

><p>Clare POV<p>

I had lied to Eli. I had no headache. I didn't need pills. I didn't need any medicine. I needed a pregnancy test. It had been two months since Fitz. I wasn't able to take my birth control. And now, I might be pregnant. I might be pregnant with Fitz's kid. I couldn't be! I kept hoping I wasn't but I had the symthoms. I was hoping with all my heart that I wasn't. If I ended up pregnant, then I would leave Eli's house. I couldn't stay there pregnant with his enemies. I couldn't expect him and his parents to help me. I would call Declan tonight after finding out the news.

" Do you need any help Ms?" A nice lady asked me.

" Uh, sure. What pregnancy test would be the most reliable?"

" Hmm, I think '_ClearBlue_' is the most reliable. Good luck dear. Remember, abortion is never the answer."

" Thank-you."

I grabbed one '_ClearBlue_' test and then went over to get some pills for headaches. I went over to cashier and checked out. I put the pregnancy test and receit in my purse. I then walked back out over to Morty. Adam hoped out allowing me to slid in. Once Adam got back in, he snatched my bag. I knew that was bound to happen.

" Hey, why isn't there a reciet in here?" Adam asked.

" Uh, they asked if I would like one. And I said no thank-you."

" Fine then we'll go ask." Eli said.

" What no! That's not neccisary!" I cried.

" FIne, then what did you buy?" Adam asked.

I looked down towards my belly. I already knew I was pregnant. I had all the symthoms. I just wanted proof. I pulled the test out of my purse, with my hand shaking hard. I couldn't stand this. They would judge me. I knew they would. I'll be kicked out of the Goldsworthy household. I'll be living on the streets unless Declan would help me. I highly doubted though.

Eli looked at the test, then at me, and then placed his hand on my belly. He rubbed a small circle on it, and then crushed his lips to mine. I pushed him off of me again. I didn't want to be kissed just cause he felt bad for me.

" Are you really pregnant?" Eli asked.

" I think so." I cried.

" Clare I don't know what to say. I won't-"

" I know, I know. I'll leave your house, dont worry about it. I won't live there anymore. I'll leave tonight." I stated.

" Clare shut up! Your not living anywhere but my house. Your staying there, and we'll raise this kid with you." Eli said pointing towards Adam and then back at him. " We'll help. No need to worry."

" No. That's not right. It's not even your kid. I can't tell you who I'm pregnant with but I'm quiet sure I am with one guy."

" Who do you think you pregnant with?" Adam asked.

" F-F-Fitz." I cried.

I turned to see Eli grip the strearing wheel. His hands turning white and his forehead against it. He then ungripped the stearing wheel and started the car.

" Clare, get in the back. Now." Eli said through his teeth.

Adam hurridly got out of the car and opened the back for me. I looked around. Isn't this where they put the dead bodies after their put in the coffens? Their wasn't a seat for me... Should I be scared now? Is he just gonna gas me back here? Can he? Is that even possible?

" Uh, Eli why am I-" I started only to be intruped.

" Clare, get in the back. Adam and I need to make a visit to someone special." Eli growled.

I hoped in the back of Morty, shaking like a leaf. Mostly in fear though, Adam thought otherwise. He shrugged off his hoodie and handed it to me with a half smile. I nodded a thank-you and looked back down at my stomach. Was their really something living in there? I'm really extremly worried what his parents will say. I think they'll understand though because they know what my day use to make me do. Maybe they'll let me stay. I mean I'm gonna end up getting really big. And they'll find out even if I don't tell them.

" Clare stay in the car," Eli growled and then slamed the door again.

I let my eyes follow them as they headed over to a park bench. And then I saw why. Fitz. I lost my breath at the sight of it. He was just sitting there enjoying life. While I had to carry the burgin of having sex with him. Of having sex with every single man my father forced me to. Even the nights I was forced to have sex with my father. I will always have to carry those memories with the rest of my life.

I then saw what made me boil inside. Fitz punching Eli. And then his friend Owen punching Adam. I got so angry that I bet my face was red. I hoped out of Morty and ran over.

" Get the hell away from them. Leave us the fuck alone! Haven't you caused me enough pain!" I screamed and cried at Fitz.

" Shut up bitch. You were begging for it. Don't deny it, you loved it."

" Shut the fuck up Fitz! I never asked for you to fuck me. I never wanted to do it with you. I never wanted to have sex until marriage. And I know no where in hell did I want to have a baby at the age of fucking 16!"

" Your pregnant?"

" Eli, Adam, I think it's time to go." I said quietly.

" I don't think so sweetie," Fitz said as he grabbed my arm tight and dragged me into an alleyway where a white van waited.

" LET ME GO!" I screamed.

Fitz didn't listen as I kept on screaming. He dragged me into the van and held his hand over my mouth.

" Listen closely bitch. If I'm the father, than oh well. I'm not not helping with anything. Your a fucking whore who deserves to die. Go to hell bitch."

" I'm already there. Now let me go!"

" Go, get out of my sight you slut."

I quickly hoped out of the van and ran. Tears ran down my face. Maybe I should just give up the hope. No one likes me anyways. There's only one person I can turn to: Jake. Jake was helpful sorta. I could get him to tell my mother for me, since I heard our parents might be dating. And then just tell her that I'm going off in the world by myself. That could work, hopefully.

I pulled out my cell phone heading to the only 'J' in my contacts. Was this right to call Jake? I clicked his contact and stared at the number. I went with my guts and called him.

" Hello?" Jake answered.

" Jake, it's Clare."

" Oh, hey Clare. Whatcha need?"

" I was wondering if you could pass a message to my mom."

" Ya sure what is it?"

" Tell her, that um." I started to feel this was wrong but went on, " That when she left, that my dad made me do alot of bad stuff. Tell her I lost my innocence. Tell her that she never helped me! Tell her I'm pregnant and that I'm going off into the world. I don't know how long it will be until I talk to you guys or anyone again. But ya, I don't know where I'm going so don't ask. Thanks Jake." I was about to hang up but Jake started to cry.

" What the hell did your dad make you do?"

" Uh, he forced me to have sex with mostly strangers. I was on birth control but I ran away from home and been staying with friends."

" Please Clare, stay with us."

" I don't. I couldn't."

" No Clare! You have to! Please."

" I guess I could for awhile."

" Thank-you. Imma tell your mom, and then I'll come get you."

" Where do you guys live?"

" Downtown Tornto. We moved. I started Degrassi the other day."

" Oh well I'm gonna go to the Dot. Pick me up there?"

" Will do!"

With that I hung up the phone and headed over to the DSot to enjoy a nice hot chocolate.

_**This is as quiet as it gets**_  
><em><strong>Hush down now, go to sleep<strong>_  
><em><strong>We were once perfect me and you<strong>_  
><em><strong>"We'll never leave this room<strong>_

_**H H H Hush**_  
><em><strong>You colored my eyes red<strong>_  
><em><strong>Your love's not alive it's dead<strong>_  
><em><strong>This letters written itself inside out again<strong>_  
><em><strong>When rivers turn to roads and lovers become trends H H H Hush this is where it ends<strong>_

_**This is the calming before the storm**_  
><em><strong>This absolution is always incomplete<strong>_  
><em><strong>It's always bittersweet<strong>_

_**H H H Hush**_  
><em><strong>You colored my eyes red<strong>_  
><em><strong>Your love's not live it's dead<strong>_  
><em><strong>This letters written itself inside out again<strong>_  
><em><strong>When rivers turn to roads and lovers become trends<strong>_  
><em><strong>H H H Hush this is where it ends<strong>_

_**I won't make a sound so you don't wake**_  
><em><strong>Don't wake, don't wake, you don't wake<strong>_

_**Hush**_  
><em><strong>You colored my eyes red<strong>_  
><em><strong>Your love's not live it's dead<strong>_  
><em><strong>This letters written itself inside out again<strong>_  
><em><strong>When rivers turn to roads and lovers become trends<strong>_  
><em><strong>H H H Hush this is where it ends<strong>_  
><em><strong>You colored my eyes red<strong>_  
><em><strong>Your love's not live it's dead<strong>_  
><em><strong>This letters written itself inside out again<strong>_  
><em><strong>When rivers turn to roads and lovers become trends<strong>_  
><em><strong>H H H Hush this is where it ends<strong>_  
><em><strong>This is where it ends.<strong>_


	4. Giving a Hand

Jake's POV

Once Clare hung up the phone I walked downstairs. She was pregnant! She lost her innocence! She was forced to have sex! I can't belive it. So much bad stuff could happen to such a nice and good person. It just pisses me off! Clare's father should have never force her into having sex. For God sakes she's only 16! Almost 17.

" Hey son. What ya need?" My dad asked me.

" I need to talk to Helen."

" About?"

" Clare, she's pregnant. Was forced to have sex by her father. She has no where to go, so I said she could live with us."

" That's terrible. And good that you made her come stay with us. I would have made you if you didn't."

" So where is Helen?"

" Well actualy Jake, I think it'd be better if you go get Clare now. Maybe then Clare can tell her."

" Ya, I guess that would work. Can I use the car to pick up Clare? She's at the Dot."

" Yep go ahead Jake."

I grabbed the keys off of the table and headed outside to the garage. I started up the car, and went towards the Dot. Was I doing the right thing? I mean I pretty much forced her into living with us. I don't want her to think I'm gonna force her into anything, other than of course doctor appointments for the baby. I can't believe it. Clare Edwards was pregnant. I guess I lost my chance of asking her out. I actualy always like her, since I became 13. She was a few months younger than me. Always had a smile on her face, and laughed so much that it made you laugh yourself. Even if the father didn't help I knew Clare would be a great mom.

Once I pulled up to the Dot, I saw Clare sitting with two guys. She kept looking down at her drink and shaking her head. What the hell is going on? I get out and then look back at them. This is when I notice the one with dark brown hair grabs her hand, are they dating? He kisses his hand and then touches her belly. Was this the guy who pretty much raped her? I walk in and go over to the table.

" Clare, come on let's go." I say.

" Jake!" Clare cries, standing up and throwing herself into me. I warp my arms around her as she rests her head in my chest.

" Clare, come on. We're gonna tell your mom together."

" You didn't tell her?"

" I thought it'd be better if you did. But I'll be by your side the whole time. And don't worry no matter what your mom does we won't kick you out. If anything we'll kick her out. She's a real bitch."

" I know that. Jake, you don't mind that I'm pregnant? I mean if I stay with you guys, as I get farther along I'll always be emotional and be a big bitch. And not to mention I'll be huge." Clare said second questioning saying yes to living with us.

" Clare, I don't care. I've liked you for a really long time, and I will even when your as big as a bus." I chuckled.

" Can we go now?" Clare asked. " I just need to give them back their jackets and I'll be ready."

" Alright. Let's go." I said once Clare said her goodbye's. " Are you cold?" I asked shrugging off my jacket.

" No, no. You stay warm."

" Clare if your cold tell me. I have another jacket in the back."

" I'm not, really."

I grabbed her hand and walked her to the passanger side of the car. I then walked around to the driver's side and started the car up. Clare shooked from the coldness, so I hoped out again and grabbed the jacket from out of the back of the car. I then handed to her, giving her a smile.

" Thank-you so much Jake. You really don't need to do this for me."

" I want to Clare." I smiled.

" You know, once I'm big and emotional your not gonna want to."

" Shut up Clare. I will always feel that way, and will always want to help you. And even when your big and emotional I'll want to help you hahahahha. Even if you try throwing a fork at me, I won't care. I'll still help."

" Thanks Jake." Clare said smiling

" Your welcome Clare."

" Hey Jake."

" Yesh?"

" Can we just drive around for now? Just go for a ride anywhere."

" Sure... Where to?"

" Anywhere." Clare said as she closed her eyes and curled up into a ball in her seat.

" Hahahhaa. Alrighty then, anywhere here we come."

I drove around town for a long time. Clare had passed out and now was just whimpering in her sleep. Why did life have to be so bad for her? I wish I could change it for her. I mean I've liked her for so long and this might be my only chance to actualy get her to notice it. I drove back to my place and cut the engine. I walked over to the passenger seat where Clare was still asleep.

" Clare, Clare time to get up."

" No, Jake... Carry me." Clare said sleepyish.

" Come on Clare," I said slipping my arms under her and around her.

" Jake, I don't feel so well." Clare said pointing her head away from my body.

" Do you feel like your gonna puke,' I asked her sitting down and setting her in my lap.

" No, I just feel faint and like I'm on a rollercoaster."

I began rubbing small circles on her back and gently patting her stomach. She placed her head against my chest and gripped onto my shoulders. I continued to rub her back and she just relaxed in my arms.

" Feel better now Clare?" I asked her, while standing up and carrying her again.

" Mhmm..."

" Wanna go to bed?"

Clare nodded her head to tired to speak. Her heavy eyelids slowly closed and she tired getting more conforable in my arms. I smiled at her new postition. Her head was on my chest along with her hands. Her knees trying to curl up into her own chest but that wasn't possible. I carried her inside and went upstairs into my room. Once I was in there I layed her down on my bed and covered her up with blankets. Hopefully that would be enough for the night.

* * *

><p>In the morning...<p>

Clare's POV

I woke up to the sudden need of puking. I don't know where their bathroom is, so I run to the only window in the room, open it, and puke. I then hear someone walking over to me, as I continue to puke everything my stomach contained. I felt them rub my stomach in slow circles.

" Clare, why didn't you go to the bathroom? Then you wouldn't have to puke out the window? Ah the crazy Edwards." Jake said chuckling.

I picked up my leg and kicked him in the shin for him calling me crazy

" Oh, so now Edwards is crazy and abusive?" Jake asked laughing even harder.

Once I was done puking, I asked Jake where the bathroom is. Of course it was the room right next to Jake's. I quickly hoped in the shower. It took me only five minutes, I could have taken longer but Jake still had to get ready. I quickly got dressed before giving Jake time to get in the bathroom. I wore my favorite pink shirt with my brown leggings and jean skirt. I wonder how much longer I be able to wear all my stuff. As I buttoned my jean skirt I noticed it was starting to get tighter. Oh well! I'd get some new clothes soon.

" Jake come on! We need to get to school! I need to talk to Eli... Please Jake come on!"

" Come down Clare! All I need to do and brush my teeth and then we can go if you please."

I quickly grabbed my bag, and threw on my flats. Jake came out carrying his bag and slipped on his sneakers. Once he put on his sneakers, I raced him to the car laughing. He ran up behind me and picked me up and then sat me down in the snow.

" Jake! It's cold." I whined.

" _Jake! It's cold._" Jake mocked.

" Not funny Jake!" I cried.

" Oh, so I have no humor?"

" Nope. Your mean hahahha."

" Clare Edwards: crazy, abusive, and now mean! Well I'm learning lots."

" Yep, and it's only gonna get worst" I said with the biggest smile ever. Maybe life is starting to look up.

**Author's Note: Okay so I'm sorta scared of Eli now... And ya did anyone see the preview for tomorrow. I hate Imogen... She's physco... Okay, also who's a fan of Harry Potter? Hehehehehehehe had to! So I've been pretty busy and this isn't my best work... I really wanted to post a new chapter today though because well today is the 27th!:DD It's my favorite number, lucky number, and my crushes hockey number hahahahaah. I'm so random:DD Anyways hope you guys liked this chapter... I'll post another chapter with in a week... Usually gonna start posting like every Wensday, but that might change in September when school starts... So yaah, byee guys:))**


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